Partly because of the dream from yesterday, I made a list of all the people who I was still holding resentment against today. I am going to do a Forgiveness Diet on each of them. There were over a dozen people, even though I had done this about 8 years ago. It’s so easy to accumulate them. In looking over my current list, there are the usual suspects: mom, dad, god, etc. The rest seem like people I had too little rapport to talk things out when problems arose, and the resentments have more to do with me than them. In other words, people who stepped on my old triggers that I’ve had since before I ever met them. Whenever I find myself daydreaming about a past altercation and I still have emotional charge about it, I know there’s some forgiveness work for me to do there. Now that I think about it, eight years is really too long to let these hang around!
The Forgiveness Diet is a technique from Rebirthing/Conscious Creation pioneer Sondra Ray. As I understand it, holding onto negative emotions and resentments causes your body to hold on energetically in general to things we don’t need and that are harmful to us (poor food choices and habits, fat, excess fluid, toxins).
My next step is a three part process involving writing a letter stating:
- what harm was done to me (what I’m angry about)
- all the excuses I know to let the person off the hook
- both of the above points of view and taking back my power to create the relationships I want
Some good books on this topic are The Only Diet There Is by Sondra Ray, Radical Forgiveness by Colin Tipping that has another way of explaining forgiveness with additional exercises, and the big daddy of forgiveness for me, A Course in Miracles that explains in great depth the spiritual nature of everything we perceive.
- 5 mins. Evolution Running warm up & drills
- 5 mins. barefoot aka chi running on treadmill at 180 steps per minute
- 5 mins. stretching, esp. gluteus (butt), hip flexors and calves
I started barefoot running a couple weeks ago by walking at first. Now I’m ready to start the running portion of the training – 5 minutes every day this week. Next week will be 10 minutes, and week 3 will be 15 minutes, etc. Today felt good!
My longer term exercise goals involve a 5k in 2 months, and adding more from there, if my body likes it.
You can check out barefoot running on Google or YouTube. I broke my ankle 6 months ago. Just walking barefoot has really helped work out the misalignments that remained in my foot, even after successfully healing my ankle. I was needing foot adjustments by my awesome chiropractor every week for a while. It got better but when I walked barefoot everyday for a week, it’s been perfect ever since.
Barefoot style running is landing on the ball of your foot, with your center of gravity aligned over your foot strike (as opposed to landing first on your heel, then rolling forward toward your toes). There is a much shorter stride, which helps you keep your weight over your feet. 180 steps per minute is considered ideal.
It is reported to have the benefit of improving your running performance by making your movements more efficient, and to prevent many of the repetitive strain injuries that plague so many runners. I am very interested in both of these, because I’m basically lazy (I don’t like to exert any extra effort that doesn’t help me to my goals) and I am feeling my age increasing (I want to avoid any excess impact and damage I can). Breaking my ankle was kinda scary too, so I really want to avoid any injuries I can. And I still have fantasies of winning medals, at least in my age group, even though I never have before. I can’t wait for the perceived advantage when I’m on the young end of the 50-60 group!
I’m convinced that the benefits are not only from using the mechanics of our feet the way they evolved to be used over thousands of years. I noticed that my thin skinned feet also got what I like to call a “reflexology glow,” from the rough surfaces outdoors. And then there’s the whole earthing thing/grounding effect, which I’ll go into in more detail when I don’t have to sleep and get up in a few hours. And I was wondering how I’d find things to write about!
Breakfast: 9:15am – 10 oz. green juice (cucumber, celery, ginger, bean sprouts), 2 T. cultured vegs., 2 oz. chicken sausage, 2 lg. eggs, 2 slices Ezekial toast, 2 pats butter
Lunch: 3:00pm – 3 c. salad, 4 oz. chicken breast, Thai peanut sauce, 1 T. balsamic vinegar
Snack: 4:00pm – 3 c. popcorn at Target (poor choice but very hungry for not having eaten a grain at lunch)
Dinner: 8:00pm – 5 herb chicken wings (baked), 1/2 c. “smoked” hummus (the usual chickpeas, tahini, garlic, olive oil, plus amazing smoked Hungarian paprika), 1 c. celery and carrot sticks
I am also taking an amazing multivitamin supplement from Great Cleanse, “Great Cleanse Essentials,” from www.greatcleanse.com. It has all the basic vitamins and lots of trace nutrients. It also has cleansing nutrition, that helps my body eliminate toxins. I would normally have to purchase these nutrients separately, at additional cost. When I researched the key ingredients, I could see that it was a great value. I have taken a lot of vitamins all my adult life. None were grocery store brands. This is the ONLY one I ever felt a positive difference after taking, and missed if I ran out.
Continuous, low-key cleansing is important to me, as I’ve learned that toxins are stored in fat tissue; more fat = more toxins. As I burn this fat, I want my body to be able to handle the toxins that are released. Maybe even more importantly, I don’t want my body to hang onto the fat due to nutrient stores and organ health not being sufficient to handle the toxins when they start to come out. If you want more depth on this, there is some good introductory info at http://greatcleanse.com/FAQ_s.html
Today was a lesson in preparation, because I wasn’t well prepared for the food I needed. Note the unplanned/not so healthy snack at 4:00pm. Yes, it’s easy to find a restaurant that has plain meat on a salad. The whole grain/starch is always the more challenging find. I am going to have to carry some canned beans for starch in my car. I also heard about some precooked brown rice, ready to eat, from Trader Joes.
Based on my reading about body typing, right now I’m leaning toward a large breakfast, a medium-large sized lunch, and a small dinner. This is the opposite of my pattern over the past 20 years, when I gained so much weight. If I have a vigorous or lengthy workout, I’m going to have a snack if I’m hungry.
My Eating Plan (loosely based on the www.KaySheppard.com plan):
No wheat, no processed sugar, no processed food.
Fruit is always eaten with protein.
I use 2 artificial sweeteners: liquid stevia and occasionally xylitol.
Portion control and balanced nutrients are based on:
- 4 oz. protein or 2 lg. eggs
- 1 c. cooked whole grain or 2 slices of Ezekial bread
- 1 c. dairy (preferably cultured/fermented )
- 4-6 oz. fruit
- 4 oz. protein
- 1 c. cooked whole grain, starchy vegetable or 2 slices of Ezekial bread
- 2 c. vegetables
- 4 oz. protein OR
- 1 c. cooked whole grain, starchy vegetable or 2 slices of Ezekial bread (OR half portion of both)
- 2 c. vegetables
- 1 c. dairy
- 1 serving protein powder (12-18 g. protein)
- 4-6 oz. fruit
I don’t know about you, but his looks like a lot of food to me on paper, and it IS, in my experience. I have been doing this off and on for a couple of months, and THERE IS NO DEPRIVATION!
So am I in denial? Crazy?
All I know is that my partner has lost 75+ pounds to bring her to a normal weight in the past 11 months, and countless others have had similar results. It seems to me the only way this doesn’t work is when a person doesn’t stick with it.
Now at the very end of Day 2, I am having a little bit of headache as I detox. I have been here so many times! So the good news is that I know this too shall pass, in a day or so, and then I will generally start feeling better.